5 must haves for a successful daily soap

This post is also published on www.womensweb.in at  5-things-about-daily-soaps-that-completely-baffle-me/

1.      Large extended super rich families all living in peace and harmony

This is a sure shot formula for success.  Normal nuclear middle-class families where both partners work in a bid to catch up with inflation, pay huge EMIs and try to strike a balance between work life and kids are a strict no no. Instead larger than life stories far away from reality are the norm. Wondering how such extended families can co-exist so happily? Well don't forget the basic rule of the thumb while watching these shows,  keep your brains aside.  

2.      Women dressed to the nine.

No matter what the time of the day is, the women in the house should be geared up to flaunt their silk sarees and jewelry. Be it 6 am in the morning or 11 pm at night, the ladies should always have their lipstick and mascara intact. I wish they would share their secret with me for even a half hour stint in the kitchen leaves me drenched with sweat and my hair strewn as if I have run a marathon.  

3.      18th century ideologies packaged under the guise of culture and tradition which portray women in a most regressive way

 A few women clad in ghunghats under the guise of culture or women who are meek and submissive under the pretext of respect for elders or advocacy of superstition in the name of religion are the main ingredients behind a successful telly show. Well much as I  would like to question the sanity of the people who religiously follow such shows who am I to question this super hit formula? 
Rather I would like to use this platform to thank the people behind these shows for enlightening us ignorant folks about what is ‘right’ & ‘moral’ & what all decent women should do. Thanks to you now all would be mothers in law look for girls who can function as full time housekeepers, thanks to you we see matrimonial ads which go like “Wanted dutiful, obedient girl with good moral values”, thanks to you a career-oriented woman is considered immoral.

4.      Good women 

Now don't be misguided by the dictionary meaning of good for in the context of telly soaps good refers to a woman who possesses the following qualities:

• Her ‘Good’ behaviour often borderlines with foolishness
• She is straight out from a black and white film with "prannath main tumhare charno ki daasi ” attitude
• Her sugary sweet behaviour is often the reason for her mother in law’s diabetes, and makes you want to throw up
• She firmly believes silence is golden
• She would rather have the earth swallow her than defy her mother in law even for the most trivial matter
• She considers it a sin to dress in any attire other than sari or salwar kameez
• She has the ability to cry at the drop of a hat
• She follows a strict code of conduct by speaking only when spoken to
• The sole purpose of her life is to keep everyone in her family well fed

5.    Bad women

Again don't be biased by the literal meaning of this word, it merely refers to a woman who meets the following requirements:

• She has a flair for hatching evil schemes against family members
• She adheres to a strict dress code which includes low cut blouses and loud make-up
• Secretly listening behind doors is one of her prime duties
• She has least one extra marital affair preferably with a married man
• She dares to make her own decisions
• The whole purpose of her life is to plot against others
• She is bold enough to pursue a career

A side note though – Dear makers of these shows, with all due respect, I do not find your shows entertaining; rather I find them illogical, degrading to women and regressive. So please wake up. The world has progressed; it’s high time you move on too.